The Secret Spiritual World of Children

Most of us understand that we cannot physically see beyond the visible part of the electromagnetic spectrum, for instance, to the edge of the infrared or the ultra violet. Accepting this, it might not be too much of a leap to realize that we may also be missing something – like being able to see or hear other beings that might actually be around us.

This is the basic premise that – if you accept it - will enable you to give Dr. Tobin Hart’s remarkable book, The Secret Spiritual World of Children, a credible read.

A Psychologist and Associate Professor of psychology at the State University of West Georgia, in Carrolton, GA, Hart started on the trail of collecting startling otherworldly anecdotes from children ten years ago when his then seven year-old daughter Haley, in a matter-of-fact bedtime conversation, revealed to him how she saw her “angel” and described their interactions. During his research he also collected accounts from adults who, for the first time, revealed their own similar but hidden childhood experiences.

“I have come to think of Haley’s angel as an aspect of her Higher Self, or higher intuition,” says Hart. “Socrates called his voice Daimon, Ralph Waldo Emerson called this the Oversoul, Meister Eckhart named it the Inner Man . I don’t think it matters whether this is thought of as guardian angel, a guide, her heart, or whatever. What is important is that she can find it on her own and that it serves as a wellspring for love and wisdom.”

In studying these stories, Hart observes that children seem to develop their own “spiritual style.” One child may be a “natural mystic” in his/her ability to access guides or guidance, while another child may be an “empath,” naturally open to others’ feelings. Or perhaps a child is a “natural philosopher” asking the Big Questions very early on. He suggests acknowledging the unique and inherent qualities each child has as they bring the mystical down to earth in our everyday lives.

This is quite a different approach than what passes for childrearing in many societies, especially in the West where much of the focus is on getting kids “to fit in.” Hart’s advice to parents is to give up imperial rule in favor of “holding and beholding.” That is, providing the usual safety and love children require while simultaneously appreciating their special abilities.

Obviously there is no way to qualify the personal experiences detailed in The Secret Spiritual World of Children, but the ring of truth in these narratives is discernable. And fascinating narratives they are, from children predicting auto accidents, or describing simple but powerful moments of ecstatic unity feelings, to a father relating how his five year-old boy fell three stories out of a window and miraculously survived without injury because, as the boy puts it after the fall, “The guys dressed in gold caught me.”

Fascinating as it all is, the reporting is not sensationalist. And there is an important message to be learned from this book. Adults have to learn to listen and accept these stories as important information about their children’s natural sensitivity. “Spiritual” experiences are not something that should be repressed, and to dismiss or denigrate these experiences can do real damage.

Children can come under intense pressures because of their sensitivity. For example, one little girl predicted that “a truck with a man who can’t speak English” would hit the car she was riding in with her mother. When the accident did occur as predicted, she went into hysteria in the hospital when she discovered the accident had been caused by an illegal alien. The poor little girl thought she was the one responsible for the accident.

For the most part, Hart believes the vast majority of the extraordinary experiences he details are powerful and positive for the child involved - even nurturing. But not all encounters with things unseen are pleasant, and sometimes children can be overwhelmed and confused by disturbing experiences. As adults, it is important we learn to guide our children and teach them to differentiate what feelings or sensations are their own, and what they might be picking up from somewhere else. This discernment helps the sensitive child navigate in every level of a multidimensional world

So, what is a parent to do to help their children balance heaven and earth? Hart provides some wise counsel that we should not make too much nor too little of a child who seems to be in touch with other realities. Parents should learn different ways to nurture their child’s creative inner flow while integrating it into the “normal” world. Most certainly they should not hush up the amazing experiences. Simultaneously, the child must also learn to take responsibility for her or his “talents” without being made to feel special or “better than” because of them.

There is a spiritual ebb and flow, an arc to these experiences developmentally. Once a child starts integrating into society, meeting kids who do not talk about or acknowledge spiritual experiences, the child may just turn off the flow. Today, at 16 years of age, Haley tells her Dad that she remembers when she talked to her spirit guides but that now “she just knows.” Another child states that she is “too busy” to be in contact with her guide.

Treated wisely, it appears there is a natural integration rather than dissipation of these modes of expression as children grow up. Suppressed, ignored or derided, the opposite seems to occur. For example, one woman, forced to repress her childhood experiences by her strictly religious family, suffered from depression as an adult. Faced suddenly with her repression as she watched her own daughter go through similar experiences, she recalled her own powers one day in a flood of ecstatic memories. Her life changed dramatically thereafter for the positive.

Reading Hart’s book, the message seems to be that if we accept our children’s spiritual lives during this time of social change, we can, perhaps, be reawakened as adults to our own innate spiritual heritage. In turn, we can then wisely shift education and child rearing practices to augment our understanding of who we are as spiritual beings for the betterment of all concerned.

Etan Boritzer is the best selling children’s book author of the “What Is?” series on inner values and character development in children.

Dr. Tobin Hart may be reached through the Spirit Institute, childspirit.org